TOP funniest one-liners, quotes and jokes on the internet! Part 1 TOP funniest one-liners, quotes and jokes on the internet! Part 1

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More One-Liners In my 20s someone told me that each person has not one but 30 soul mates walking the earth. They offered him a lift and started driving again. How do most men define marriage?

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

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I hope to have one someday. This is stuff that works. My wife and I always compromise. Women's Dating Conversation Two single women meet for coffee. Soon the weather got bad, driving conditions got nasty, and they had a bad accident.

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My other wife is beautiful. Whether you're looking for the woman of your dreams, or you've found the woman of of your dreams, you'll appreciate this. The Perfect Date One day a perfect man and a perfect woman went out on a date.

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Click here to read my review. Whether you got a lot or not datesyou'll get some grins.

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Clean short funny jokes Funny one line jokes about dating, relationships and marriage to make you smile. About a half hour later Susie came running back in the house, her clothes disheveled, and yelled: When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

When a newly married man looks happy, we know why.

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Then he is finished. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that. A woman already knows. Share your own jokes and feedback in the Comment box.

My darling wife was always glum. She could probably screw all night. When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have in-laws. A few minutes later Susie came downstairs and they left on their date. If you can fake that, you're in.

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Women, stop reading now. It was the perfect woman. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. They all said the same thing: The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature.

Words to live by: This explains the accident. Why bother with marriage? Dead people are free.

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The difference between marriage and death? I can guarantee it because I've used it for years. Marriage is give and take. They wore their perfect clothes and drove a perfect car, and after a while they passed a stranger in distress.