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Thank you for subscribing. But others, like Susan Patton, the Princeton alumna and mother who in March wrote a letter to The Daily Princetonian urging female undergraduates not to squander the chance to hunt for a husband on campus, say that de-emphasizing relationships in college works against women.
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You agree to receive occasional updates and special offers for The New York Times's products and services. If you've never used Periscope before, here's how it works: They were found in a wide variety of ways, from chance encounters in coffee shops to introductions from friends.
The idea of lugging a relationship through all those transitions was hard for many to imagine. Some had gone to elite private high schools; others were on full scholarship.
Instead, she enjoyed casual sex on her terms — often late at night, after a few drinks, and never at her place, she noted, because then she would have to wash the sheets.
That pretty much precluded a serious relationship, she said. Patton, who has two sons, one a Princeton graduate and the other a current student. I want you to have changed and become enough of your own person so that when you meet me, we can have a stable life and be very happy.
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For some, the only time they truly feel off the clock is when they are drinking at a campus bar or at one of the fraternities that line Locust Walk, the main artery of campus.
Keenly attuned to what might give them a competitive edge, especially in a time of unsure job prospects and a shaky economy, many of them approach college as a race to acquire credentials: They belonged to sororities or would never dream of itreported for the school newspaper, sang or danced in performance groups, played sports.
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Some women described a dangerous edge to the hookup culture, of sexual assaults and degrading encounters enabled by drinking and distinguished by a lack of emotional connection.
They spoke over the course of the academic year, often repeatedly and at length.
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Some described extracurricular commitments — running debate tournaments for local high school students, or organizing Model United Nations conferences — that took up 30 to 40 hours a week, and came on top of going to class, doing homework and, in the case of less-wealthy students, work-study jobs.
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